"If Women Were Cars And Men Were Drivers"


Rapper Megan Thee Stallion says she sleep only with exes to keep her body count down, even if they are in a new relationship.

IMG_4946.jpg

If a woman was a car, what would she be? Would she be unshipped and unbuilt, test driven, leased, rented, or bought? The unshipped and unbuilt cars are the virgins. Good drivers have to travel across seas just to see the car. Most good drivers aren’t traveling across the ocean for a good car, when they can just go to the Toyota Dealership. The unshipped and unbuilt cars are the most inaccessible, unless the man works as a broke docker or paid engineer. Nothing is worse than an engineer “ “Stepfording” a virgin car the way he wants the car to drive.

Test driven cars are the cars that are practically knew, but has been test driven a few times. The man has to show his insurance and driver’s license to get in the car. Test driven cars mileage is low enough to not need maintenance. The leased cars are the cars men keep long-term, move them into their garage, but not permanently. They aren’t sure about committing to the car, but they do like the way it drives. Lease cars definitely have moderate mileage and need maintenance, even if they only had a few drivers. Rented cars have the most mileage. We all know different men rent cars every week. Men who rent cars tend to run up the milage, run over potholes, smoke in the car, and dirty up the car, because they do not own the car. Then, bought cars never have to worry about milage. The driver has the credit and he loves the car enough to commit to maintenance, payments, and insurance.

Every woman sexually values her vehicle differently from the next woman. Some women weigh their worth by remaining abstinent until marriage. Some women weigh their worth by being sexually liberated. Other women weigh themselves by how many sex partners they had in the past. Some women weigh their worth by the financial status of men they get in their bed. Some women weigh their worth like Meg Thee Stallion, by keeping their body count low, even if it means sleeping with exes who are in relationships. Some women weigh their worth by not having babies before marriage. Other women weigh their worth based on the age they start being sexually active. For instance, they wait until they are grown and mature enough to handle sex. Some women weigh their sexual value and standard by not living with a man. Then, there are some women who do not see their sexual energy as simply a number. Those women believe in taking agency over their bodies.

Although to each her own, having agency over your body is the most important sexual value. In today’s culture, the meaning of an empowered woman is a woman who is capable of taking full agency and ownership of herself . A woman who has agency over her body cannot be dumbed down to body count or any physical numerical measurement of her worth. She doesn’t view her sex life like the New York Stock Exchange. Any mature man can see her through a kaleidoscope. She is versatile in all her angles inside and outside of the bedroom. A woman who has agency over her body is mentally , emotionally, psychologically, and physically understanding and confident about her sexuality. She goes through different phases of celibacy, safe sexual practice, self-pleasure etc. She defines her sexuality, not a man. I have a simple rule, “ If a man tries to dumb you down to a number, then he needs to be dumb down to a number too. Ask him about the number of cars he own, the size of his house, the size of penis, credit score, and salary”. When playing the sex numbers and mileage game to see who is worthy enough for love , nobody wins the game. Sex is a vulnerable topic for women as well as men. In my opinion, how many people do you know had a fair shot in being virgins until they felt comfortable and confident about sex? Those are conversations that are not discussed. Yet, we sexually judge each other and ourselves. Besides, why should anyone care about someone’s intimate past ( unless it’s sexual trauma)? Is the person sexually healthy?

As long as the car is functioning properly, highly maintained, and the car is attractive, then the driver shouldn’t care. Most importantly, the car deal-her needs to make sure the driver has credibility to own, provide, maintain, and highly insure the car. Remember the driver is keeping the car and not the car keeping the driver.

Alicia Smith